shadows in my heart
I don't really have a thoughtful post today. This is just a rather rare spillage post. I am feeling so down today. I don't really know why, although my very strong guess is that it's a hormonally driven down-ness. And I hate that. I hate that my emotions are in any way controlled by the balance of my chemical makeup at any given time. I hate that I am now going through my day trying not to be impatient with people who don't deserve my impatience because I'm a female. I hate that the most mundane things provoke me to tears for no reason other than my body is telling me that they are the end of the world. And the problem with this office job is that it is so much easier to drop the guard that keeps me from being the word that rhymes with witch when there are so few people around. In a classroom, there is enough distraction to survive the hormonal days. In this office, there isn't always. Probably I also need some sleep. Probably it would have been a better day had the headline this morning not been a story about an impatient teenager cutting off a school bus, thus causing the death of three of his fellow students. I've just had that on my heart all day.
I think I need the time to have a good cry.
Comments
Hang in there, sister. "He knows are frame, that we are but dust." Our emotions are subject to these bodies that our Lord called "the form of a bondservant." The spiritual is bound to the physical for now. However, within these "earthen vessels" is a "great treasure." And though the "outer man decays" continually, we are "renewed within, day by day. Tomorrow will bring new sunshine.
Posted by: Mike Greiner | November 29, 2006 04:29 PM
Thank you for the reminder. I need it often lately.
Posted by: dramatic ren | November 29, 2006 06:33 PM